Does the Chocolatey Mistress have a Deus Ex Machina?

GOD YES! She does! And what a huge beast it is. You’d have tears coming down your cheeks from just seeing it! What kind of deity would She be if She didn’t have this absolutely necessary and often used tool?!

Let’s face it: in today’s market for worshippers you just can’t win against your competition with “I’m good, believe in me”. You need a spectacular show. You need wonders. You need unbelievable acts. And not even a deity can pull all those out of their hat without a proper Deus Ex Machina.

Also it comes in very handy whenever you have tied yourself up in a knot of your own lies, discontinuity errors, or just plain logic.

Take for an example this unlucky turn of events, as described by Douglas Adams in “The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy”:

“I refuse to prove that I exist,” says God, “for proof denies faith, and without faith I am nothing.”

“But,” says Man, “the Babel fish is a dead giveaway isn’t it? It could not have evolved by chance. It proves that you exist, and so therefore, by your own arguments, you don’t. Q.E.D.”

“Oh dear,” says God, “I hadn’t thought of that,” and promptly vanishes in a puff of logic.

Now observe how the proper use of a Deus Ex Machina could have solved this divine mishap:

… But by a random chance of luck a spaceship sucked up the vaporised deity and recreated it in all its glory behind its exhaust pipes. God now looked like a flying spaghetti monster.

For the less theatrically inclined among us, we could also use the Deus Ex Machine in what is commonly known as the “Dallas Resurrection”: