We are not attempting to mingle science and religion here. Well, at least not much. It’s more a bit of tidbit information on two statements that are famous for Einstein, but which he got slightly wrong because he couldn’t know better. So let us tell you what Einstein - and you - did not know.
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We may not be the most modern church, but we are not out of this world. Some of our priests and many people from our community are avid World of Warcraft fans and play it relentlessly … usually while enjoying a piece of Chocolate Cake and enjoying the time they saved by not having to go to church.
(9 votes, average: 3.67 out of 5) Loading ...“And yet the sweetness dragged me in and beguiled me.” And again “And yet the sweetness dragged me in and beguiled me.” Those are the words I want you to consider. They are the subject for today.
And that, as Chapter three of Heston Blumenthal’s Great Cakes of the World’ has said, could so easily be that, were it not for the chocolate in the icing.
Like you, I have cried “Enough! Enough for I am sated! Speak of these things no more, for all will be lost should you continue!” And, like you, I was lost, and am now found, and now worship at the feet of The Chocolatey Mistress.
(2 votes, average: 3.5 out of 5) Loading ...Yes! Yes! And Yes!
Vanilla cake is an abomination. It’s against nature. It’s an incarnation of the devil. It’s distastefully sweet and should not be considered cake at all. Vanilla, good as it may be, is not meant to be made a cake. Thus has the Chocolatey Mistress decided, and we agree and abide.
We know it looks tasty and delicious, but it only tries to deceive you and get control over you. The first bite will make you wake up from that bad dream and you realise your huge mistake. However the Chocolatey Mistress is forgiving, and she does not hold these sins against you. Her strong recommendation to not have vanilla cake is for your own protection only and no bad consequences but those from the cake alone will come your way.
(3 votes, average: 4.67 out of 5) Loading ...Hot, as one might say, on the heels of the news of the cake burning in Germany, we look at Austria, its smaller and once annexed neighbour for what many see as the ultimate devotion. “How,” they ask, “can any other cake, any other Torte, offer so much to The Chocolatey Mistress? How?” And they bow their heads in silent contemplation of the rich chocolatiness, the apricot tartness, and they wonder.
I have been privileged to partake of Cake at the Hotel Sacher itself. Were The Chocolate Church to have buildings in which to worship, this would be a shrine! And eating the glorious Torte in the premises where it was conceived… Deep joy.
(3 votes, average: 4 out of 5) Loading ...One of our regular church goers showed me this post about Chocolate as a Teaching Tool
I have discussed this with other priests, and we agreed that the Chocolatey Mistress would be strongly against commercializing Chocolate or Chocolate Cake in order to influence children.
Obviously this is not more than a blunt and transparent marketing scheme to create a very early brand loyalty to Hershey chocolate bars. We think this is unethical and should be stopped.
Leave Chocolate in the cake and the cake in the church, where it belongs.
(2 votes, average: 5 out of 5) Loading ...It has come to our attention that Chocolate pornography on the internet is increasing every day, and people start asking questions about that. We think reason enough to discuss some important moral questions. Is Chocolate porn perverted? Is it endorsed or forbidden by the Chocolatey Mistress? Let’s settle this important question once and for all.
(2 votes, average: 5 out of 5) Loading ...Today there will be no sermon. Just let us sing together, and praise the Chocolatey Mistress with this hymn:
(3 votes, average: 5 out of 5) Loading ...I am saddened to have to break these news to you, but we have received this report from one of our brethren in Germany. It is sad, it is shocking, it should not be happening in this day and age. There have been Chocolate Cake raids and riots in the streets. Read our eye witness report and decide for yourself. Read More »
(2 votes, average: 5 out of 5) Loading ...Can there be words expressing better the feelings that all true believers in Chocolate Cake bear deep in their hearts? I do not think so. And all the more am I moved that this exciting statement does not come from a Chocolate Cake disciple, but a group of young musicians. Read More »
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